Respect for the Ex: Getting Along for the Kids
Being a parent with someone you’re no longer in a romantic relationship with can be tough. Many parents who have split up or divorced can get along, but it’s often difficult to put aside feelings of animosity. But when you have a child or children together, it’s important that you concentrate on parenting. You need to remember that your child should come first and that your feelings for your ex shouldn’t get in the way of being a good parent. If you need some tips for great parenting as a divorced or separated couple, here are some of the tactics to keep in mind.
Formalize a Custody Agreement
Not every couple needs to go to court to work out a custody arrangement. Many are able to come up with something on their own. However, even if you work out an arrangement amicably, it’s still useful to get your agreement formalized. It’s helpful in case something changes in the future or one of you starts going back on their word. If you do need legal help, a family lawyer like those found at https://www.kanialaw.com/ can help you out. Sometimes, you need an attorney to fight for your rights to make sure that your custody agreement is fair.
Put Your Child First
The most important thing to remember is that your child needs to come first. They need to be treated as a person, and not as a pawn. You’re not expected to completely forgive or forget anything that you feel your ex has done. But it is wise to try and put all of that aside so that you can concentrate on parenting your child. Whether your ex cheated on you or never paid you enough attention shouldn’t have any bearing on which school you decide to send your child to or whether it’s a good idea for them to go to summer camp. Don’t use your child as an excuse to argue with each other.
Allow for Different Parenting Styles
Any parents, whether they’re together or not, can have disagreements about parenting. When you’re a couple, you might decide to come to a compromise much of the time. If you’re no longer together, there might be some big decisions you make together. Find some tips on how to do that at http://sincemydivorce.com/. However, when it comes to some smaller things, it’s important to learn to let things go. You might be worried about each parent having different rules or reactions, but kids can learn that at mom’s house they can do one thing, while at dad’s house they have to do another.
Try to Be Flexible
Even if you have a very clear parenting plan, you can’t always plan everything to the letter. If you’re both willing to be flexible sometimes, it can make life easier for both of you. Sometimes you might need to arrange for earlier or later pick-ups and drop-offs, or perhaps swap visitation weekends. Just makes sure that one of you isn’t always being more flexible than the other.
If you do your best to get along with your ex, it will be better for your children. Put aside your differences and unite over who you have in common.